Nothing deep really. I just want to talk about Philo class, which I still love despite tons of workload. Father David just has his way of getting into people's heads I think. Whatever we talk about in class does apply to how we live. I mean more than those superfluous and exaggerated lessons on citizenship, he adds other real-life stuff that makes the lessons strike home. Whenever I leave the class, I strangely feel like I know what to do with my life. Okay maybe that's giving him too much credit, but the class has that sort of effect on me. And only a few teachers really have that effect on me.
More than the feeling the need to change, I feel that I want to and I'm ready for it. I really need that. For a time I've been in that hopeless state. Now, I'm definitely ready for change. I have had enough obsessing about the past and all those bad things today that remind me of of it.
I believe I've changed a lot. My friends would probably think otherwise. I never colored my hair or got taller even an inch. I still got my braces and I'm still quiet around new people, and still noisy around familiar crowd. What they don't see is the way I think know. Not that I'm smarter or anything, but that the issues I used to obsessed about in the past have lost their importance. My attitude towards how to live has changed profoundly I think. I'm losing the bitterness I've felt for a long long long time. I'm better.
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