It's something inner that trembles whenever I listen to such songs. Both gratitude and finitude appears harmoniously in this state of mind. Not that the song alone brought this about, although it really helped, but that the moment you realize how tight you grip on certain thoughts-of immutable stuff, you get the feeling of ewan- I don't know how to put it words anyway. Wierd, I know. But isn't it exactly through this way that we come to find ourselves in this world? Amorphous and floating about the vacuum will only left us more confused, right? Do we just let go of these "realities" that we've come to know as something very real to us? It may sound stupid but we try to get a hold of something ill-defined which we supposed to be ourselves, to be true, etc- when in reality it's based on the same ill-defined stuff. Permanence, is it meaningless to shape it from something in constant flux?
How do you do the opposite? Fear is my motivation of doing the former- I fear doing the latter. I guess, in the end, my perrennial question will persist: It's a BIG STORY but is it my own? Yes, they may not be mutually exclusive, I do acknowledge that. Maybe, I'm really selfish after all. But isn't it a valid selfishness. We were, but we're clueless, ergo the illusion of permanence- even the worship of it to some extent. We feel the need to create myths of the flux and of our won to counter that not-quite stuff which we are part of. Something's wrong definitely in doing so.
Now, I'm giving too much away. I need some serious fizzy drink. Being a Joker makes it hard to be really affected. Yes, this entry ends perfectly well with another effort to concretize the witness. I'm not him by the way.
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