then what?

After all the orals, written exams and papers, which was supposed to be distributed through out a month but packed in one week, one is but expected to have some sort of tranquility and harmony with everything, la la la la la. It did not happen- and won't especially when you've tons of regrets about the final orals you had with you favorite Theo teacher. I sucked at the orals- terribly flunked! I realized how I could've answered moments before my time was up! It was something to do with Fundamental Option and Social Sin- an easy topic yet I forgot how I was supposed to deliver. Naturally I was so freakin' pissed getting out of Theo Dept- and more pissed seeing the stupid Benildean-turned-Atenean "friend", who kept insisting we didn't do any hard work in our capstone course (the much loved ITM course)- he had to rub his merit in my face.

If you're dense enough to follow me to this point, you'll see the title makes no connection to the first paragraph. What the? you ask. Thank you very much. What was that about? Anyway, I was so freakin' pissed, right? After that, I went straight to two of my best buds who were already watching Memoirs of Geisha at Ken's house (i.e. dibidi). The skanks didn't wait for me! Naturally, I lambasted them with my complaints and regrets about my substandard performance towards the conclusion of my college life.

Okay, I've nothing more to say about post-grad mushy shit. Cathartic musings about graduation have become so omnipresent since last Saturday that even YM status messages shout them- seniors, how pathetic have we become? Naturally, I was one of the emos who put up a similar messages. True enough, such musings may be so common they make us puke, but they're so true we can't escape them- Pabaon was all about such. Pabaon was a nice way of assuring seniors that there's something good down the hill. I was convinced, brainwashed, hypnotized, however you want to put it, with whatever they did in the program, especially Father Nebres's part- except the hour-long PowerPoint show by Guidance and Placement. The latter two tried to individualize us by announcing statistical shit about "our" personality. How about that? You just have to love them for attempting at irony.

Sarcasm aside, this is supposed to be a reflective entry- I've been using "profound" too much, thus the word. I forgot what I was being serious hours earlier. While I was tweaking some codes for my drop down menu (see under chronicles), I thought of something brilliant, but I can't remember it. I think it had something to do with my attempt to work/study after MIS. I haven't talked to the relevant people in school- be doing it tomorrow. Call center may prove to be the most lucrative part-time job there is- but I'm too proud to be take on the job. Shit, I need cash- must start independence right away.

I'm too literal to even make this look trivial. I'm not too lost now, thank God! I used to worry too much about post-grad scenario. I've finally realized that I was afraid only because I imagine it to be such. Must act. I'm trying to get into a few odd jobs just for the sake of experience. I'm not sure about most things anyway there's no point not trying.

...

After trying so hard to digress from post-grad musings, I end up with the same things. Just for a semi-sidetrack, I'd like to point out my profound indifference regarding the current "crisis" in Celadon. I have my opinions and I've signed a stupid survey. People are already frothing at the mouth about it. I shouldn't add any uneducated speculations. Celadon is a microcosm of Philippine society, where the "members" who "have a stake" at what's happening are but the people who make tambay at the celadon table and their galamays. Beat my conyo. Old enmities surfaced the way I like it- must solve through parliamentary means.

Okay, that was not a nice way of ending the ties I have with the org. Don't get me wrong, I love most of the people in there. I just don't like how some people point out the issue's relevance to their lives as though Celadon is some living entity- just like how politicians make use of "The Philippine Society" or the Common Good. Love the freakin' retards. Don't appeal to any abstract stuff, we know politics.